This magical boner honey is sold under several brand names, like Black Horse or Bio Max — the kind of dumbass macho names that desperate aging men are attracted to. This is probably the same demographic that didn’t start wiping their assets with wet wipes until a brand called Dude Wipes came along. This is honey, but for men *guitar solo*.

These aphrodisiac honeys are often touted as being “all-natural” when they actually contain all the same run-of-the-mill erectile dysfunction active ingredients you’ll find in Viagra and Cialis, like sildenafil and tadalafil. Those medications require prescriptions in France.

French Customs Officials Seized 31,000 Tons of Erectile Dysfunction Honey in 2024

The illegal shipments of honey come from a variety of countries, like Turkey, Tunisia, Thailand, and Malaysia. They typically arrive by freight or via smaller parcels through express mail. France’s largest seizure of this boner-generating honey happened in Marseille in November when authorities found 13 tons of the erection honey divided into 860,000 individual packets.

This unregulated boner nectar can cause serious side effects like kidney injuries, and convulsions. It can also make your brain swell as if it had suffered a traumatic injury. It’s enough to make you wonder, is a single boner worth turning your brain into a water balloon and your kidneys into mush?

Judging by the 31,000 tons of boner honey seized in 2024 the answer is yes. Man up and get a Cialis prescription from your doctor, you flaccid cowards.

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This would ensure that a particularly lonely night for the average teenage boy could end up costing them a few college semesters. The bill includes exceptions for sperm donation.

The whole thing is, of course, a joke. Although you are forgiven for believing it’s real given the current state of conservative mass hysteria. Senator Bradford Blackmon is a Democrat who, according to a press release he shared on Instagram, confirmed that the bill was written in response to the Republican obsession with policing what women can and cannot do with their bodies.

His goal was to shift the scrutiny from women to men who dare to selfishly waste their precious genes via masturbation when it could be making a baby so God can be happy.

Mississippi State Senator Introduces Joke Bill That Criminalizes Masturbation

Supreme Court overturning of Roe V Wade has led to several states enacting near-total abortion bans, including Mississippi. Though, ironically, and not surprisingly, more infants have died in a post-Roe V. Wade America than they did when it was the law of the land.

Blackmon is rightfully sick and tired of the reproductive rights debate falling squarely on the shoulders of women when men also play a mighty large role in the fertilization of an egg. They are half the equation, after all, so why not some laws governing what men can and cannot do with their bodies? If women can be penalized for making a personal decision about whether or not they want to carry a baby inside of their body that they’ll have to raise for 18+ years, shouldn’t men have to face some kind of consequence too?

Or can they just get off scot-free, impregnating whoever they want whenever they want on their terms, the woman’s thoughts, feelings, and humanity be damned? Mississippi is one of 12 states with near-total abortion bans.

The bill is a symbolic gesture that will likely not pass in Mississippi’s Republican-dominated political landscape filled with men and women who don’t believe women should have a say in what happens to their bodies but fully believe a dude can jizz with impunity. It’s safe to say none of these Republicans will be swayed by the gesture.

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As The Wall Street Journal reported, some Walmart managers will pull in as much as $620,000 per year with the company’s new pay raise structure. The base salary for these positions begins at a cool $160,000 and goes as high as $260,000. That’s a 25 percent increase in starting base pay. There’s another $100K that can come from stock grants.

The real kicker is the updated bonus structure will allow for an additional 100 percent of employees’ base pay to be tacked on with good performance. At this point, I agree with what you just thought reading that: yes, we messed up, we should all apparently be working at Walmart.

Joking aside, this position comes with the responsibility of overseeing up to a dozen stores in a designated region. The company has 400 market managers under its umbrella who keep watch over 4,600 accounts.

In WSJ’s report, it’s noted that while this move aims to benefit managers taking on the most responsibility, workers below them may not see the same boost. Remote work is ending for office-based staff and policy changes will decrease health insurance plans.

The company’s reason for placing so much emphasis on market managers, specifically, is that they are “key for our business and for serving our customers however they shop,” a spokesperson told CNN.

In today’s society, where the average household income is $85,000, Walmart is well ahead of other companies in terms of its pay for management-level employees.

No wonder the company could pay a marketing firm a ton of money for a logo redesign that didn’t really change anything.

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We’re on the verge of another major advancement, though I’m not sure if this one is really necessary. DraftKings and Delta announced a partnership earlier this month, and one of the ideas for said collaboration involves in-flight betting. The first state that appears to be interested is Connecticut, which saw Rep. Christopher Rosario introduce a bill this week to legalize in-flight betting for flights originating from the state.

When the two parties announced its partnership, a Delta spokesperson said that “the ability to gamble is not currently part of that exploration” regarding in-flight accessibility. This legislation in Connecticut is the first hint of what could come with this partnership. Rosario told Front Office Sports this move aims to keep the state “competitive in the sports betting market.”

Sports betting is literally everywhere. Commercials, billboards, social media, you name it. Every sportsbook is out there trying to get you to sign up. New Jersey alone has brought in more than $51 million since legalizing it in 2018. It’s no surprise, then, that these businesses are looking to capitalize everywhere and anywhere, including at 10,000 feet.

Rosario’s bill says that in-flight gambling would have to comply with the state’s regulations and that one percent of the wagering revenue from this new income stream would go toward public education.

This will likely be a highly debated topic within the courts as more and more states move to legalize this tremendously popular form of betting. Opponents will point to this being a dangerous way of fueling gambling addicts who are in a plane and essentially trapped in their seats for who knows how long with a gambling ad scrolling across the screen in front of them. Meanwhile, proponents are no doubt seeing endless dollar signs.

The post In-Flight Sports Betting Could Soon Be a Thing. Because We All Need That. appeared first on VICE.

Now, this is technically not a new thing. When he first took office in 2017 through 2021, he installed a red button—I’m imagining it looks like the ‘That Was Easy’ Staples’ button—on the desk. With him returning to the office this week, he didn’t waste any time in bringing the button back. The Wall Street Journal confirmed that the contraption was quickly set up in the office Monday, meaning it was a part of his extensive Day 1 activities in the office.

Again, I have to say you have to appreciate someone so committed to what they love. Now I’m just wondering to myself what I would install a button for. One for Michelob Ultra refills? Or a button that brings me soft pretzels whenever my heart desires? The opportunities are endless.

Donald Trump’s Diet Coke Button is Back in Washington

The Coca-Cola company is well aware of Trump’s fandom of its beverages. They even gave him a commemorative bottle recently with an old-school soda bottle and a White House label on it that listed his Jan. 20 Inauguration Day. It was presented to him by the company’s CEO, James Quince.

During his first term, the New York Times revealed just how obsessed he is with Diet Coke. Trump reportedly drinks 12 cans a day. There’s no way that’s healthy, right? I drink one of them, and I instantly hate myself for consuming the sugary drink.

More power to you, Trump. By this point, his body has gotta be comprised of 75% Diet Coke flowing through him.

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An MRI revealed meningiomas, a common type of benign brain tumor, one of which was pressing on the nerve surrounding her eye and causing severe pain. The removal of a tumor inside someone’s skull often requires removing parts of the skull, leaving the patient with gnarly incision scars and a lengthy recovery process, assuming the surgeons don’t deem them inoperable in the first place.

Kaviya’s surgeons, Asim Sheikh and Jiten Parmar, recommended a version of the procedure that was still invasive but much less so than the one requiring the removal of chunks of her skull.

Rather than slice giant gashes in her head, they made a tiny 1.5 cm incision beside her eyelid, then slid a flexible tube with a camera on it called an endoscope through her eye socket to excise the tumors. The procedure is called an endoscopic transorbital approach. It’s safer, and much faster than some traditional surgeries, and has the added benefit of reducing trauma inflicted on the patient, allowing them to more quickly recover from the surgery.

Kaviya had major brain surgery wherein a tumor was removed from the inside of her skull and she was discharged from the hospital after two days with relatively little swelling and side effects.

It wasn’t just the endoscopic camera that made this possible. When the surgery was still in its planning stages, the surgeons consulted with a biomedical engineer named Lisa Ferrie who helped them create a 3D model of Kaviya’s skull that allowed them to practice and plan the endoscopy tube’s journey through her head before they made so much as an incision on her actual skin.

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The answer might more realistically lie in a series of smart design choices that kept the inevitability of wildfires in mind. While luck certainly is in play, a more realistic view is the adage that luck happens when preparation meets opportunity.

Choosing the right materials and implementing smart construction techniques will do you a lot more good than hoping the fire embers hop over your home. Or, as California architect Greg Faulkner said while speaking to the Associated Press, because there are, say, 50 ways a fire can burn your house. And “if you eliminate half of those, or three-quarters of them, that’s not luck, that’s increasing your odds.”

Some LA Homeowners Were Lucky to Survive Wildfires. Others Had Smartly Designed Homes.

Faulkner, an architect specializing in fire-resistant home design, says that fire-resistant materials should be installed all around the home. Just as homeowners in South Florida protect against hurricane-force winds by installing sturdy metal roofs and wind-resistant windows, homes in California should install fire-resistant roofs, walls, and windows.

Homes with traditional wood sidings are a fire waiting to happen in an area prone to wildfires. Alternatives like stucco or fire-resistant gypsum-backed wood siding are much preferable. They slow the spread of heat to the interior of the house, increasing the home’s chances of surviving fire.

Double-pane windows can reduce heat transfer from threatening exterior flames. Some homes go even further by installing fire shutters that protect windows by completely closing them off of the blaze, also a lot like South Floridians do with hurricane shutters.

Ventilation systems with vent covers that automatically close when exposed to fire are a wise choice. External sprinkler systems can help dampen grass and keep flames at bay. All of the stuff costs money that some homeowners just can’t afford.

Buying a home with the stuff already installed can raise the price from 3 to 6 percent and by as much as 10 percent if the house is really decked out in fire-resistant materials. It will eventually pay off if it keeps a home from being reduced to embers during the next wildfire.

The post Why Did These Homes Survive the LA Wildfires When Their Neighbors Didn’t? appeared first on VICE.

The original fossil was excavated from Egypt’s Bahariya Oasis in 1914 by Richard Markgraf and sent to Ernst Stromer von Reichenbach in Munich. Stromer initially classified the dinosaur as a Carcharodontosaurus, a large predatory dino that lived in North Africa around 99 to 94 million years ago. Its name derives from Greek and means “sharp-toothed, or shark-toothed lizard.”

Around 30 years later, allied forces conducted air raids on Munich in our battle against the Nazis. Most of the collection was lost, including the fossilized Carcharodontosaurus. Only a handful of Stormer’s notes and a few pictures and illustrations survived.

Over 100 years later, the photos were found by Maximilian Kellerman, a master’s student at Ludwig Maximilian University in Munich. Kellerman and his team noticed that the fossils looked just a little bit different from those we associate with the Carcharodontosaurus.

Eventually, they concluded that the dinosaur was a whole new species they named Tameryraptor markgrafi. The Tameryraptor is a combination of Latin and agent Egyptian and means “Thief from the beloved land.” The Markgrafi part, of course, honors Richard Markgraf.

The new species is thought to have been around 33 feet long, which would safely make it one of the largest carnivores to ever walk the earth.

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This wasn’t exactly a surprising move, considering Trump’s history with the organization. He attempted to remove the U.S. from the WHO in 2020 before Joe Biden overturned the decision and resumed funding for the organization. One of Trump’s major running points during his campaign was keeping American dollars in-house and not paying for what he perceived to be a waste of funds, which always meant the WHO was in jeopardy. 

Trump cited the organization’s “mishandling” of the COVID-19 pandemic as the main reason for the decision.

Donald Trump Pulls The United States Out of the WHO

Above all else, it’s the money the country has invested in the WHO that ultimately fueled the decision. America has been the WHO’s largest donor since its inception in 1948. The country has routinely given around $163 million in yearly contributions, with that number going as high as over $800 million at times. There are up to 194 countries involved in the WHO, with America providing up to a fifth of the organization’s funding, per USA Today. 

“Everybody rips off the United States and that’s it—it’s not going to happen anymore,” Trump said on Monday during a press conference.

Without the United States providing funding, the WHO will now likely lean on China, which has typically been the next largest provider. The order signed by Trump on Monday specifically mentions the population size of China and the fact that, despite it being far larger than The States’, the country pays less than 90% of what America does to the WHO. 

Japan, Germany, and the United Kingdom have rounded out the top five contributing countries over the years.

The World Health Organization has yet to comment on Monday’s order. 

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But in case you missed it, we could all use some comedic relief on this “Blue Monday” (or the third Monday in January, aka the saddest day of the year). Here’s a collection of the most uncomfortable inauguration moments.

Barron Trump Completely Dissociating While Elon Musk Is…Being Himself

Barron Trump does not seem impressed by his father’s words, but Elon Musk has enough enthusiasm for 10 men. After the oath of office, Barron also shook hands with now-former President Joe Biden and VP Kamala Harris, while his parents opted against it.

Carrie Underwood Singing A Cappella After Waiting in Awkward Silence

After an excruciatingly awkward moment of silence waiting for her music, Underwood realizes she has no choice but to sing a cappella, requesting others join in. I will say, she still nailed it. 

Melania’s Hat Shielding Her From Her Husband’s Kiss

Trump went in for a celebratory kiss with his wife but was rejected by her protruding hat. Their facial expressions never cease to make me laugh, with Trump seemingly accepting defeat and Melania wearing a smirk. It almost looked intentional.

Mark Zuckerberg Glancing Down Lauren Sánchez’s Shirt Every Two Seconds

Jeff Bezos’ fiancée Lauren Sanchez got some backlash for her fashion choices, to which I say let a girl wear what she wants. Zuckerberg, however, seemed to have trouble focusing his eyes while standing next to her. Dude didn’t even try to hide his glances down her shirt. Did he forget this was being filmed?

Elon Musk Making a Very Questionable Gesture…

It’s clear that Musk was a little…excited and passionate at Trump’s inauguration, yelling in victory with childlike energy. But at one point, he gave what many believe to be a certain kind of concerning salute. (You know the one.)

The billionaire has since accused his critics of using “dirty tricks” to attack him. I don’t even really know what to say about this…

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